BS: Volume 1, Issue 13

Lavisitya, Lavalon - The Democratic Coalition has collapsed. Long dormant in Lavalonian politics since the moce to Proboards, Emperor Z has returned and what a return he has made! It is a shame no one thought to nominated him for the FNORD Messiah Award for Best Resurrection. Z was assumed by Xon to be an honorary member of the TDC, and when Z returned he made it quite clear that he had no desire to be associated with the organization. Then he joined the PBP as the 4th member. VP Henzelli and presidium of the Socialist Party also removed the SPL from the TDC and rejected all intentions of Xon to name him or the SPL as honorary members of anything. Regent Jon of The Other Party (TOP) also retracted the TOP's assumed membership, leaving the TDC down to only to Xon's Heritage Party. That caused Xon to close up the TDC and to found the "successor" organization, the Democratic National Party, which had inherited Jon, Henzelli, and Z's honorary memberships. They all denounced such assumptions, leaving the DNP at just one member, Xon. The SPL also announced that it would like to caucus with the PBP and they would since songs. After the announcements, members of both parties exchanged humorous and senseless songs.

Lavisitya, Lavalon - Perhaps in an attempt to keep the Chief Justice's job interesting Xon filed a lawsuit against Pres. Chowdhury for intentionally putting a "Neem Tea Company" banners in the advertisement section of the forums. He insisted they were propaganda. An impossible feat as the ads on Proboards are there as a trade-off for it being free, and they are determined by the amount of keywords in a thread. He intended to use the lawsuit to make the judiciary force the government to move to his own forums that he is constantly trying to make the government switch to. The trial was not accepted by the judiciary. As a result, the Neem Administration filed a suit against Matthew Vasroixe (Xon) for using the judicial branch to spread libel against the president and for using the judicial branch to humiliate and discredit his political enemies. Responding the the charges, Vasroixe countered with "I ask the court to refuse to take that case in light of the fact that the Neem suit was a joke and in no way libelous. If the case against me for libel is allowed to go forward, I will not show up in the courtroom." The case did indeed go forward and Mr Vasroixe pleaded guilty to the charges. He was sentenced to a public apology to Ms. Chowdhury.

Lavisitya, Lavalon - A few bills in the General Assembly all have a common theme, and proposer. Vasroixe proposed the Medicinal Eucalyptus Act that will encourage the use of eucalyptia in medicine and require cough drops sold in Lavalon to contain a helpful amount of eucalyptus oil. The apparent lack of cough drops and drug companies in Lavalon is spelling doom for this bill, which is losing 1-3-0. Another bill, which turned out more like a public service announcement was apparently intended to protect eucalyptus forests. The fact that no Lavalonian citizen lives in an area hospitable to the natural growth of the plant helped foster confusion as to even why the bill was needed. It has been withdrawn from the floor and discussions about conservation of the plant may continue in the Cafe. It is the view of the Sporadically that Vasroixe, sensing a tough struggle for the retainment of the eucalyptus as the national symbol, intends to pass all this vieled laws that deify the plant so that, even if not official, the eucalyptus will remain bound to the Republic in our virtual cough drops.

Lavisitya, Lavalon - One of the newest and most proactive members of the PBP has organized an e-March to protest the notion of moving forums to ones produced by Mr Vasroixe. This is, of course, Z. Z has renewed the vigor of the Bagelcraticans in their lukewarm attempt to remain in the governments current location. When it was discovered that Basic Law 1 (Lavalon uses a series of basic laws to act as constitutional documents) required the government to meet at the forums created by Nathan Shepard. That means a move would be unconstitutional. Vasroixe lead a campaign to remove the offending clause so that a move would at least be possible. He continually reassured us all that a move would not result from this. Nathan Shepard, creator and admin of the current forums intended to vote for the amendment, because it restricted the government too much. However, Shepard wished for the Basic Law to be amended to say that the location of the forums would be decided by the General Assembly. When this amendment was not added, and the full amendment went to vote, Shepard voted no. He also rationalized that since he doesn't want the forums moved anyway, he shouldn't vote for the whole amendment, even with his addition. The addition, he claims was insurance if the amendment actually passed, which it is not currently doing at 1-4-0.